Category Archives: Family

Last year on our first anniversary I wrote MQD a list of 365 reasons I loved him.  This year I did the same.  Much of what I write here is an effort to keep a record.  A record of the time passing.  There is so much of our lives we think we will never forget.  And then you turn around one day and you can’t remember.  Today.  Today, I want to remember.  They are sweet, precious days that someday will become ancient history.

365 More Reasons…. one more for every day….

for MQD, on October 27, 2010

1. You asked me to marry you!
2. You have me convinced I will be able to get pregnant even though I am a zillion years old.
3. You’ve reminded me this past year that I have a thicker skin than I thought.
4. You’ve also made it clear in this last year that you have a thinner skin than I’d imagined and taught me to mind my mouth.
5. You shamed me in to not screwing with my phone while I drive.
6. You continue to take your health very seriously.
7. You make me feel like my own health is important.
8. You still tuck Emily in every night that you’re home .
9. Which is most.
10. You’ve turned out to be a great room mate.
11. You’re responsible.
12. You like decorating for Halloween!
13. You make Arrabiata every time I ask.
14. You do the dishes even though I know you hate it.
15. You’ve trained me to laugh at cat videos.
16. You read in bed. And you leave the light on even when I am ready to go to bed.  But the “sexy man reading” still trumps my desire to go to sleep.
17. You laugh at the things you read and don’t always share them.
18. You’re ruining the little jam band fan I was raising.
19. You are an amazing “Mike” to our little girl.
20. You have an awesome mother.
21. You have an awesome father.
22. You have an awesome sister.  (This was worth three spots because they are truly that wonderful, and I feel so lucky to very soon consider them my family.)
23. You are not a bed hog.
24. You don’t leave towels on the floor or on the bed.
25. You’re teaching me to “ask” you and not to “nag” you when I need something.
26. When you watch terrible movies you admit they are terrible.
27. You have so many wonderful books.  And you loan them to me.
28. You write in cursive.
29. You are intentional.
30. You’re honest.
31. You’re a good friend to me, and to your friends.
32. Speaking of them, you have fantastic friends, both old and new.
33. I can say this now after two years!  You look GREAT in a suit.
34. You have a great laugh.
35. You’ll dance at weddings.
36. You almost always lock the doors at night.
37. You take your personal hygiene very seriously.
38. You tolerate my desire to walk on a specific side of you.
39. You enjoy my family.
40. My family enjoys having you around.
41. You understand that my “family” is not limited to those to whom I am blood related.
42. Ok.  I love Cat.
43. You are a sharp dresser.
44. You like to play games around the table.
45. You have a zero tolerance for cheating policy.  :)
46. You’ve learned a lot about yourself this year.
47. Much of it has been scary and hard to swallow.
48. You are sharing more and more of those scary and hard to swallow moments with me.
49. You’re not stereotypically “male” in most ways.
50. You let me do the grilling.
51. You act very grateful for the meals I prepare.  Even when they are less than stellar.
52. You teach by example.
53. You have good table manners.
54. You went to dance lessons with me.
55. You left with me when we decided it was ridiculous.
56. You’re a great “date.”
57. You make time for me.  For me to be your girl.
58. When you reach across a table or a room or our bed to place your hand in mine, I never doubt that it was done with intent.
59. You will likely notice if I repeat any of the “Reasons” from last year.
60. You will likely dig out last year’s list and reread it some time in the next week.  But you won’t probably mention to me that you have.
61. You are secretly so much more sentimental than I knew.
62. You think about us as a “family.”  As your family.
63. You like doing fun things with us all together.
64. You don’t think of babysitting as babysitting when I go out.
65. You got a big boy hair cut.
66. You shave almost every Monday morning like clockwork.
67. You almost always remember to come and give me a kiss right after you have shaved.
68. You embraced my coffee cup of water to keep the sink from clogging plan.
69. You remember to buy stuff at the store when we run out.
70. You don’t make me feel stupid even though I never remember.
71. The way you giggle at our silly “inside” jokes is my favorite sound.
72. You are firm with Emily.
73. She will know that she can count on you, much the way I know this.
74. You talk to me about your job, and try to explain things.
75. You value my opinion.
76. You are an adorable wedding planner.
77. You are generous.
78. You make me unashamed.
79. You don’t seem to be interested in regularly taking up a lot of space on the couch.
80. You don’t seem to mind that I do.
81. You give Emily chores. And help her to remember them.
82. When you get up to get yourself a drink or when you make tea at night you always ask if I’d like some, too.
83. You give me space.
84. You take yours when you need it, unapologetically.
85. You are committed to helping me understand the emotional roller coaster of being diabetic.
86. You make delicious banana bread.
87. You make crispy bacon for me.
88. And floppy bacon for you and Emily.
89. You ask me if your clothes match, and it’s cute.
90. Most of the time they do.
91. You understand why I nag you about whether or not you ate lunch.
92. You are mindful of regular car maintenance.
93. You really hear me and I can see the changes in us that result from our listening to each other.
94. You kiss me, really kiss me.  Still.
95. You take Em to school.
96. You know how much she loves you even when she fails to tell you.
97. You get misty eyed when we talk about the future, about our future.
98. You’re writing wedding vows.
99. Six months in advance.
100. You finally went and had your nipple ring checked out.  And I am glad it is finally healing so I can hug you again.
101. You read my silly blog.
102. You apologize when you hurt my feelings.
103. You understand very little of my life is “private.”
104. But you don’t mistake this lack of privacy for a lack of sincerity or intimacy.
105. You are very carefully helping me to not pass along my insecurities to Emily.
106. You begrudgingly give me extra room in the closet.
107. You write nice things in cards.
108. I like the way you make an X over the I in your name.
109. You make Em open the cards first when she opens a present.
110. You love Sue Sylvester.
111. You help me enforce the not too much TV rule in our house.
112. You’re a good role model for kids like Austin.  I like that.
113. You remind me to take an umbrella.
114. You’re a gentleman like that.
115. You wax nostalgic about your “twenties” in a cute way even though you’re still in the thick of them.
116. You make up funny parts when you read Emily a story.
117. You have a good sense of direction.
118. You like nice things.
119. You still “court” me even though you’ve got me for good.
120. You apologize when you raise your voice.
121. You find the most absurd things funny.
122. You don’t take yourself too seriously.
123. You never make me feel like I’m not the most beautiful girl in your world,   even though you never really say that.
124. You check in on me, but it never feels like you’re checking up on me.
125. You write me funny all caps instant messages that make me smile.
126. You call me on my office line and it makes me blush.
127. You read metal blogs.
128. You could probably write a metal blog.
129. You almost always buy a t-shirt when you go to a show.
130. You stay up late talking to my mom.
131. You know in your heart of hearts I love your owl talons.
132. You are not bashful.
133. You know who Mary Tyler Moore is.  And I don’t care if it is only because she is in your tribe.
134. You always check the mail.
135. You like scary movies.
136. You agreed to go somewhere warm on our honey moon.
137. You take your own hobbies and interests seriously and don’t mind shelling out the cash to enjoy them.
138. You have a lot of beauty products.
139. You have exceptional eye sight.
140. You make a face when you say “Tinkerbell” that slays me.
141. You’re good at sticking to a budget.
142. You read Unconditional Parenting.
143. And you let it really touch you.
144. You love to scare the shit out of Emily.
145. You will endlessly debate things.
146. You’ll drop it when I am finished.
147. You almost always come out to see if we need help carrying anything.
148. You conquered your fear of flying.  With a little help.
149. You hug me at the airport, or the train station, even when it hasn’t been but a few days.
150. You un-facebook from time to time.
151. You’ve brought a lot of levity to some heavy days.
152. You let me cry about my divorce.
153. You still let me cry from time to time.
154. You know how much I love you.
155. You have pretty eyes.
156. You’re daring.
157. You are forgiving.
158. And yet you are relentless.
159. You have no patience for my typos.
160. You LOVE meat.
161. You introduced me to the term meat sweats.
162. You don’t litter.
163. But you like to pretend you’re going to to see my horrified face.
164. You challenge me.
165. You give me the phone when you’re on the phone with your family.
166. Oh!  Your grandmother, she is her very own reason that I love you!
167. You carry my shit in your purse when I don’t take one.
168. You are protective of your girls.
169. You have a wonderful home town.
170. You look so happy the first time each fall that you can wear a stocking cap.
171. You’re a good shopper.
172. You try things on in the store.
173. Your wedding proposal was so sweet….
174. You took the time to write down the details of the evening of our engagement when I asked you to.
175. When you wake up in the morning you pop out of bed sometimes without kissing me.  But you always come back after your shower and say good morning
176. You turn the shower off and not just the water,  finally.
177. You’ve given me both the strength and the confidence to stand up to you.
178. You probably recognize that #177 sure could bite you in the ass.
179. You heard me on October 15th when we talked on the porch.  And you know that I will do everything I can to make us work.  Including face the things that scare me.
180. You stand on the porch frequently when Emily and I leave the house, and you wave at us.
181. You make me feel like part of you will be missing until we return.
182. You let me decorate.
183. But you have an opinion.
184. You never throw my Snoopy on the floor.
185. Or disrespect my Pillow Dog.
186. You agreed to let me match up your socks.  Because the willy nilly throw them all in there approach was going to make me insane.  Even though they are not my socks, Or even in my drawer.  Just knowing they were in there.  Wild and loose.
187. You are very conscious of not having tons of leftovers that we throw out.
188. And to that end you will eat meatloaf many, many days in a row.
189. You can drink a case of diet coke in about six hours.
190. You like Morphine now.  And give me props every time we listen to them.
191. I enjoy the Hour of Slack.  And I can not believe this.
192. You are a stickler for DOING not TALKING about things.
193. You tolerate my interest in football even though you don’t give a shit.
194. You have our wedding date on your calendar as Big Day.
195. You know that getting married won’t really change anything.
196. You know that being “husband and wife” by title will feel good, though.
197. You agreed to watch Dexter from the beginning even though you have seen the first three seasons.
198. You’d flip if I gave a shitty kid’s movie 5 stars on your Netflix.  (I wouldn’t dare.)
199. You don’t roll your eyes when I talk about my boob food girls like they are my in-real life friends.
200. You encourage me to get to the gym by making sure I have the time to go, but don’t make me feel like you think less of me when I don’t.
201. You laugh at me when I am ridiculous.
202. Sweet Ass Parking Spot Day.
203. You tell me when I have bad breath.
204. You carry Emily when my back hurts.
205. You remind me not to because of my back.
206. You appreciate when the sky looks pretty.  And you’ll stop to look.
207. You get choked up when you talk about how much you love us.
208. You want a dog some day.
209. You can laugh when I pick on you.  Most of the time.
210. You let me know when it is not one of those times.
211. You put up with me.
212. You make Date Night feel special.  Just by the way you look at me.
213. You will make an amazing Husband.
214. You will make me feel like a Wife.  A real Wife.
215. The vest.  I think you will retire the vest some day.
216. When you like something you buy it in every color.
217. You play by childhood rules.  First one to turn the radio on picks the music.  First one on the couch, remote in hand, picks the show.  I’m not sure you know you do this.  But you do.
218. I like it.  It makes things predictable.
219. You’re mindful of the A/C.  But not stingy with its use.
220. You make a funny face when we are in the car and you’re driving and you bring something up and then you nod… as if to say “So, look it up and tell me what you find.”
221. You are frequently exasperated with me.
222. You still make me giddy when you call.
223. You are creative.
224. You let Em and Kellan play with your bass.
225. You delight in showing Em how things work.
226. You always forget to put the lettuce in the fridge.  And for some reason it makes me smile when I see the salad spinner on the counter after you clean up the kitchen.
227. You keep me in check.
228. You make me  a better mother.
229. You never forget things.  Not important things.
230. And #229 is so true that I am easily convinced I failed to tell you something when you do forget things.
231. I think you will be a very engaged school parent.
232. You carve a mean pumpkin.
233. You ask me to do things for you that are easy, I think because you know it gives me pleasure.
234. You notice the small things.
235. You will make a Google document about anything.
236. You’re excited for our wedding.
237. You understood all the reasons it made me feel weird to talk about it before we were engaged.
238. You wanted to ask my Father in person.
239. You DID ask my father, the first chance that you got.
240. You love garlic.
241. You don’t mind hanging out in the kitchen with me while I cook.
242. You shred your junk mail.
243. You like your little horror movie & monster figurines.
244. But you let the kids play with them.
245. You humor me.  And my idiosyncrasies.
246. Your underpants…. someday.  Someday you won’t make me giggle.  And that will be a sad day.
247. You smell the milk for me when I think it’s bad.
248. You don’t mind watching Chitty Chitty Bang Bang every weekend.
249. You shine your shoes regularly.
250. You make fun of our age gap often enough to make me feel like it really doesn’t bother you.
251. But not so often that it bothers me.
252. You like waking up early in the morning.
253. You’re not afraid of babies.
254. You are genuinely thrilled to see that Gia is happy to see you.
255. You’re open to examining why you feel the way you do about things.
256. You bought me This Book Will Change Your Life. And you don’t think it is silly.
257. You don’t let me dwell on things.
258. You love Tosh.0.
259. You tolerate my crap TV.  And I am SURE this is a repeat from last year, but you STILL tolerate my crap TV.
260. You took a leap of faith with me.
261. You examine your own religious inklings. Often.
262. Without you I’d never know the joy that is TISM.
263. You never delete shit on the TiVo.  Or at least I think you don’t.
264. Sometimes you offer to take us out for dinner “my treat” and the way you say it melts me.
265. When I look out the window and I see your car pulling in my heart skips a beat.
266. You miss me when you go out of town.
267. You are teaching me not to yell.
268. You finally started drinking bottled beer.
269. You “invented” peanut butter on waffles.
270. You love full fat cheese sticks.
271. You take your crap out of your pockets before you throw it in the laundry.
272. For the most part you throw your clothes in the laundry.
273. You are open to shopping for an alternative footwear to your grey sneakers.
274. You wore your flip flops a lot this summer.
275. You think we don’t “need” cable TV.
276. You got ADT installed.
277. You make the best “WTF is wrong with you” face.  Often.
278. You actually say ROFLCOPTER.
279. You’re savvy.
280. You got Em a pink car seat. For your car.
281. You try not to screw around with your phone while we are talking.
282. You never seem to lose me when we are out in public.  Which is great.  Because I seem to lose you, me AND Emily.
283. I think you really will start going to the UU Church with me.
284. You know when something is just not a good fit for you.
285. You came back to me.  Because I am.
286. You hold me tight when you know it is time.
287. You say “Shhh shhh, c’mere” when I need you to just Be.  To Be there.
288. You have some good ideas about wedding music.
289. You didn’t make me feel like I pressured you to get married.  Even though you could have.
290. You read at the pool.  At the table.
291. You remember to pack snacks.
292. You drive even when you don’t want to.
293. You planned on going to that Bridal Shower.  And it was a fun afternoon.
294. You like Big Plans.
295. You surprise me.
296. You’re a good speller.
297. You will probably see the connection between #295 and #296.
298. You will stick to a meal plan if I make one.
299. You are an excellent Grocery Shopper.
300. You are careful.
301. You said “we should get a booster seat” last night and you weren’t kidding.
302. You’re a lightweight these days.
303. You talked me in to putting a password on my phone.
304. You call me when I can’t find my phone.
305. If you roll your eyes you at least do it behind my back.
306. You cut me a lot of slack.
307. You are vain.
308. You volunteered to take on parental roles.  And have executed them all with grace.
309. You always introduce me, never leave me feeling awkward.
310. You call Em “my daughter.”
311. You draw funny pictures.
312. You keep cryptic notes to yourself.
313. You trust me not to invade your privacy.
314. And I trust you to do the same.
315. You are handsome.
316. YOU WEAR JEANS!  ( Oh man, I almost left this one out…)
317. I think you will become a jogger this year.  And that makes me proud of you.
318. You push the stroller.
319. You helped me in the garden.
320. You look cute when you sleep on the couch.
321. You can fall asleep with your shoes on.
322. On the bed.
323. You make me feel like everything is gonna be just fine.
324. You fall asleep in mere moments.
325. You always have cash for the tolls.
326. You are my best friend.
327. You get excited when we cross a state line.  No matter how long we’ve been in the car.
328. You never forget to bring the fruit to school.
329. I trust you with my most precious thing in your car.  Daily.
330. You’re really good about staying on track with the timeline for our day.
331. You are down with having a Prom Party some day at our house.
332. You don’t mind that I let the neighborhood kids wreak havoc on our schedule some times.
333. You are super funny when you get on the trampoline.
334. You can’t find things in the fridge.
335. You have a big heart.
336. You wanted to call some kind of animal helper/veterinarian/control person over a turtle.
337. You’ve exposed Em to Ren & Stimpy.
338. You’re careful not to expose Em to too much else.
339. You make the grossest sound when you have something in your teeth.  But it’s endearing.
340. You love your tan sweatshirt.  Like, LOVE it.
341. You will play “Which thing would you buy,” my all time favorite catalogue game.
342. And the things you want are so damn funny.
343. You love The Spinners.
344. You really value mouthwash as its own step in the teeth routine.  Not as a substitute for brushing.
345. You will not entertain my “what ifs.”  Sometimes this makes me insane.  But most of the time it saves me a tremendous amount of worry.
346. You were behind me getting my IUD removed 100%.  Well not actually behind me,  That would have been awkward.
347. You try not to let my seven hundred and thirty day long game of Grab Ass bother you.
348. You bring the trash cans back.
349. You can’t fold laundry to save your life  But you try.
350. Your ability and desire to articulate your feelings has grown exponentially.
351. You forgive yourself. I have learned a lot from you about this.  And I admire this.
352. You forgive me, too.
353. You don’t mock me.  Even though I know you have countless opportunity.
354. You share your “man room.”  With the kids of all people.
355. You have watched with anticipation our cats becoming friends.  And you comment upon it like it is international news.
356. You’re scared sometimes.
357. When I speak about the possibility of “us” not making it, you noticeably cringe.  And you finally said “I don’t like it when you say that.”
358. You’re interesting.
359. You don’t like talking on the phone but when I am driving a long distance at night you’ll chit chat with me.
360. You have given me a Life Do-Over.
361. You know that this year’s list made me cry even more than last years.
362. You are mine.
363. You are your own person at the same time.
364. You are my “happily ever after.”
365. You will understand that even though this year’s list might have some repeats, and it is definitely more focused on you and me and Emily than just you and me…. that I still love you, madly.  For every reason I listed last year.  And all of those above.  And a thousand more. Happy Second Anniversary, baby.