When I kissed you, girl, I knew how sweet a kiss could be…
The Archies had it right. Sugar. You are my candy, girl. I love sugar. Love. Sugar. And if I ate all natural straight from the source sugar with moderate regularity that wouldn’t really be a problem.
But that’s not really the case.
Just a few days after my decision to stop buying peanut M&Ms on the regular I had to stand in a long line in front of this sign. A SALE! On peanut M&Ms!! I must have been a real asshole in a former life to be faced with this. I resisted.
I will eat more peanut M&Ms. But I will not eat the whole bag mindlessly. Or because it is “what I do.” I will choose to have a few from time to time. Peanut M&Ms are not good for me. But they won’t kill me.
Diet Coke on the other hand? They might. Not right away. But if I drink one a day for the next fifty years that is an awful lot of Diet Cokes.
A while ago I realized I hadn’t had one in three days. So I went a few more. And then (like an addict) I had “just one.” You know, to see what all the fuss was about. Were they even that good?
Yes. They are good. Diet Coke is a magic elixir. I like it cold, warm, flat, old, from under the seat of my car, left on the kitchen counter and diluted from ice cubes. I like it. So, I had a few more.
And then I quit again.
I think it needs to be over between us. I can’t have just one. Somewhere out in the ether you will find a bunch of sad Marlboro Lights. You will recognize them by their long faces. They probably never really understood that we wouldn’t be getting back together. I quit smoking a million times. And then one day I stopped “quitting.” I just stopped. I don’t feel weird when I go to a gas station anymore because I don’t need to think about not buying a pack of smokes. Seek them out, they can probably help you understand my sudden rejection.
And Diet Coke, one day I will stop looking longingly at you in the refrigerated section. I might even say hello when I stop over to grab beers on a summer afternoon. But don’t get friendly. Don’t act like you and me are a thing. I can’t promise we won’t ever share another kiss. But Diet Coke, it is over between you and me. Over. And really, it’s not me, it’s you.
I guess I went about this challenge ass backwards. Instead of gobbling up free packs of sugar I took a long look at the sweets I do eat and why. I eat sugar because I think I deserve it. Candy and soda (which is basically rotgut) is my treat. How screwed up is that? That’s not a treat. I am not being kind to myself. Instead of candy and soda from the gas station why don’t I have a spoonful of the delicious zillion dollar local honey we keep in the cabinet? Or run in to the grocery store and buy the tastiest piece of fruit I see. That is what I deserve. How about you? Are your treats really a treat for your body? And are they rare or do you reward yourself more often than you realize?