Day 15: Gay for the Day!

Gay for the Day!

I failed.  And I really tried.  I didn’t see a single woman all day besides my daughter.  And I’m not even going there.  I did have a brief chat with one of my daughter’s teachers, but she doesn’t ring my bell, not that one anyway.  Heh.

So, off to the gym.  I was hopeful that I might get to have an entertaining encounter.  I even went in to the locker room, thinking that I could guarantee that I’d not be distracted by anyone of the male persuasion in there.   I hung around in there for a few minutes, just long enough to  start feeling like a creep and moved on, hopeful that my yoga class would have some enticing young ladies.

My trip to the gym actually was a double mission.  Last week I managed to surreptitiously snap a pic of  a bearded cute young man who looked an awful like the third Avett Brother.  I’d recently had a conversation with someone about how camera phones could easily be used to snap pictures of people with out them even realizing it, so I quickly took a picture of this cutie as an example.  While my efforts were appreciated I was told that the picture I got was altogether too blurry for her to confirm that he did really resemble an Avett Brother so I was on a mission to secure a less blurry photo.

Waiting in front of the room for the yoga class to begin I felt like a cast member of the Jersey Shore… I was CREEPIN’ for sure!  As a not-single gal this alone had me a little giggly.  Moments after spotting the Avett look-alike he got on his phone and I was able to snap a quick pic of him talking on the phone and incidentally looking right at me.  It was perfect.  I win!  Mission One accomplished.  Now, to set my sights on a lady.

There were a handful of cute-ish girls, but all of them  younger than the last.  And while I think a 17-year-old boy is about as cute as they come, pardon the expression, the teen gals do nothing for me.  I’m sure there is something to be uncovered by a therapy session in that,  but moving on… Well, not just yet, speaking of uncovered in a therapy session, I did notice that while actually scoping out chicks at the gym I found myself just as critical of other women as I am of myself.   I often wonder if my body image issues are motivated internally or externally, primarily.  In really looking at other women I realized a few things… I think my “ideal” is totally fucked by societal standards.  And even in a gym full of college aged women I couldn’t find a “perfect 10.”  What does this mean? I should chill the fuck out and relax a little and not be so hard on myself.  And if I was a lesbian I think I might be a real pain in the ass.

So…. in to yoga class I go.  Still failing miserably at today’s challenge.  I did try and spend less time grabbing at and eyeing MQD’s ass than I typically do in a day.  And this is saying a lot.  But still not enough to make me feel Ive succeeded.  Throw down my mat and see that Yoga Boy/Avett Bro is right next to me.  He has a placed another mat next to him, presumably for the recipient of his phone call.

And she enters the room.  Cute little blond, crosses in front of me to Yoga Boy/Avett’s Brother’s spare mat.  Awww.  His girl.  Of course.

I spent the next hour attempting to make eyes at this young lady, but it was a huge fail.  She made really screwed up yoga faces, for one, and for two…  the fact that the only time I even kinda thought there was a glimmer of somethin’ somethin’ in my innards was when I could check out her butt from a most interesting point of view (looking through her boyfriend’s legs…)

Moral of the story… I failed.  I love boys.  Boys, men and everything in between.  Today wasn’t much of an epiphany.

One response to “Day 15: Gay for the Day!

  1. Shout out! I concur, that second picture was teh awesome. Still waiting on the shirtless pic. You can crop the girlfriend out. kthxbai

Gimme some love!! Please?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s