I did not want to run today. That happens to me if I take a day off. In my heart of hearts I am not an Exerciser. I am a creature of Habit. I like to do whatever I have been doing. Yesterday I slept in and skipped a workout. Hence, I wanted to do the same today.
I peeled myself out of bed and poured myself into running clothes, anyway.
For the first two miles I was only going to run four. During the third and fourth mile I thought maybe I might run seven. Somewhere in there my headphones died and I found myself in this weird, inexplicably flat neighborhood that I have never seen before. And I ran and smiled and ran and smiled and marvelled at the flatness. And then I checked the map and realized that in order to get home from there I would be running nearly nine and a half miles.
So, I settled on ten and and for the second time this weekend I just looked at the leaves and thought about what a ridiculous phrase “fall foliage” is if you say it a bunch of times in a row.
And I ran. And I smiled some more and I sang to myself.
I didn’t have anything on my mind when I left the house. Sometimes I will use a long run to tease some Truth out of whatever mess I have in my head. But today, I was smiling when I left the house. And I just ran. And smiled. I stopped twice and took two pictures.
When I turned down my street to head home I had the runner’s high smile. I felt good. Really good. I was still singing.
Sometimes I have to work hard to make sense of my day. Today was an easy day. I run to find my Truth. I am now and hope to always be “on the road to find out.” Right now the road is a literal road and my feet carry me mile after mile, sometimes closer to the Truth and sometimes not. My Truth, whatever it is that I cling to in order to stay sane, “it lies within.” And when I feel like I am drifting above my life and not really feeling it or participating all I need to do is Locate Love and before I know it I will be almost home.
I feel pretty lucky today. I feel pretty lucky most days.
I love this.
Ellie is two months old — how did that happen?
I bought a cheap used treadmill last week. It’s big and bulky, but we managed to make it fit. I strained my back getting E out of the car a few weeks ago, but I’m going to a chiro to get it fixed so I can actually use the treadmill. It was cheaper than a jogging stroller, and I don’t think I’d be very good with one of those — I run just slightly faster than a brisk walk, so I’d feel lame using it.
In other news, Andy is out at Milwaukee Rep for two weeks doing a show, so I am heading to Kernersville to visit his folks for a few days. Driving down this Friday and back Monday. Any chance I can catch you guys one if those days?
Tis all for now. Mama’s gonna go have a beer. Nom.
xo S.
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